Trouble
by Uriel Falcon
Summary: Sara Sidle faces everyday challenges like the rest of us. Luckily, she has a quick solution to most of her troubles.Oneshot, HUMOUR, femmeslash.


**Trouble**

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own CSI or any of its characters, nor do I own Axe shower gel or Axe deodorant body spray, although I own a container of each. And I'm a girl, so that protests to how good it really smells, even if it is technically for dudes... This story contains femmeslash, humour and maybe some boobies. Nah, just kidding, no graphic boobies.  
BTW: Axe rules, Tag sucks, get it right.

**DAY 1...**

Sara ran down the hallway as fast as she could, her thick boots thudding on the floor, causing an echo. Random lab technicians looked up from their work as the frantic and terrified brunette tore by them at a speed normally reserved for cheetahs and cars. Greg walked out of the locker room just as the leggy woman slid in front of the door, gesturing wildly.

"GREG OPEN THE DOOR!!" Greg shrieked and ran back into the locker room, opening it in the process. Sara leaped through the door and scrambled to her locker, flinging it open and rummaging around furiously in an attempt to locate her savior. From down the hallway, an angry screech could be heard.

"SARA SIDLE, YOU INSENSITIVE ASS!!" came the booming voice of Catherine Willows, Sara's longtime nemesis and current subject of her hidden affections. Sara continued to dig frantically, hoping that she would find it. Just as the door swung open, the brunette pulled out an aerosol container of Axe body spray, the Phoenix fragrance, and gave her self a quick air bath. She then tossed the container back in her locker and slammed the door.

Greg cringed and watched in horror as Catherine grabbed Sara by the collar of her shirt, intent on initiating a screaming match. He was shocked, however, when the fiery blonde stopped in mid-scream to sniff Sara. The brunette opened one eye to check if she was still alive, only to see Catherine lunge and cling to her tightly, sniffing deeply in the crook of her shoulder. Sara winked at Greg, and gave him the thumbs up.

Greg stuttered and turned away, walking out the door with a grin stretching from ear to ear. He really needed to get some of that stuff.

**DAY 2...**

Sara sauntered down the hallway, a file under her arm and a coffee mug in her hand. Today felt like it was going to be a great day. She waved at the random lab technicians, she smiled at passers-by, she even gave a half-grin to the dreadful Ecklie. Yes indeed, today was a good day for the well rested brunette.

"SIDLE!! MY OFFICE, NOW!!!" Well, that notion came screeching to a halt. Sara sighed and turned towards Grissom's office, indeed irked about why he would be yelling at her, considering the tall woman had just entered the building a short while ago. When she entered the office, Grissom was seated at his desk, glaring at her over his glasses.

"Um, hi?" Sara slowly sat down, sipping at her coffee. Grissom's eye twitched.

"Don't 'hi' me, you've got some explaining to do!" Sara blinked and quirked her head to the side.

"Not following, Griss. What did I do?" she asked. He suddenly looked very sad.

"Do you know what today is?" Sara stared at the fuzzy-bearded man before her, and suddenly it hit her. The 17th of August. Oh, shit.

"Of course I know what today is! Happy birthday, Gil!" She exclaimed. But in the back of her mind, one loud question boomed its way around her mind. _What the hell am I gonna get him?_ Grissom beamed at her, obviously pleased.

"Goody, you remembered! Okay, carry on." Sara stood up quickly and zoomed out of the room, shaking herself to make sure there were no creepy crawlies anywhere. _Damn, damn, damn, I knew I forgot something! Wait... Oh, I know what to do! _

The brunette quickly made a detour towards the locker room, once again rummaging through her locker to locate a quick gift for Grissom. _Pink frilly apron? No, too blunt. Half of a tofu dog? Eww, that's not mine! Axe Tsunami deodorant and body spray pack, unopened... Well, I guess I'll have to take one for my pride... _Sara grabbed the pack and quickly stuffed it in some frilly paper she found crammed at the back of her locker. The brunette really needed to get around to cleaning her locker at one point or another.

Sara strode into the break room a minute later, watching as Grissom attempted to be humble while tearing open the wrapper to a new lens for a telescope. The rest of the team was there, ready to cut some birthday cake for the normally controlled Grissom. We suppose because he's turned fifty, he's gone a little loopy.

"Aw, Sara, you didn't have to!" Grissom said when he opened up the package. The brunette grinned.

"Happy birthday, Griss." Another disaster avoided.

**DAY 3...**

"Dammit, if she doesn't start talking about something actually related to what we're asking, I'm just going to shoot her!" Sofia exclaimed as she stormed out of the interrogation room, crossing her arms and snarling from the back of her throat. Sara suppressed a giggle. The suspect had been hitting on Sofia since she was brought into the room. The blonde's temper was very close to overcoming her sense of reason and normally cool attitude.

"Well... I have an idea that might work, but you're not going to like it..." Sara mentioned, reaching into the pocket of her coat to pull out an aerosol spray can of Axe Clix fragrance. It was a good thing she was nuts for this stuff, or she wouldn't have enough fragrances to help out her buddies. The detective looked at her questioningly, before her jaw dropped and she took a step backwards.

"No way, Sara. I am NOT playing seductive cop with that woman, no way!" Fffft. Too late. The brunette had already sprayed a line across the detective's chest. Sara grinned, tucking the Axe back into her pocket.

"Go get em', Sofia. Oh, and pop a button, some cleavage won't kill you." Sofia growled at Sara before popping open a button and stalking back into the interrogation room. The woman immediately sniffed the air and grinned in a sexy manner.

"Ooh, now that's something I could get used of..." Sofia ignored her comment and sat on the desk in front of the woman, sliding over a pen and some paper, leaning over to give a flash of cleavage.

"Maybe if you'd start talking, you might." The woman immediately started writing, Sofia watching as details about the murder were scribbled onto the page. Brass chuckled in the corner, but silenced himself as Sofia shot him a glare. The woman finished.

"Now, how about that maybe?" Sofia got off of the desk calmly and walked out before she roughly kicked a chair with enough force to send it eight feet down the hallway. Sara made a sound that resembled an 'eep' and slowly sneaked away before she felt the wrath of the blonde. But she couldn't help herself turn around and fire off a parting shot.

"By the way, nice tan!" Sara shrieked and ran as a chair collided with the wall behind where she had just stood.

**DAY 4...**

"Will you all just PISS OFF and let me do my job?!?!?!" Wendy yelled, slamming her palms down on the table. Nick, Warrick, Catherine and Grissom all backed off immediately. Wendy took a moment to compose herself before calmly turning to the now terrified CSIs.

"What I meant to say, was that I'll do these DNA profiles in whatever order I want. Stop hovering over my shoulder." The brunette's revised sentence drove the message home, and soon the four CSIs scurried off like little mice. Sara, who had been watching from the doorway, laughed to herself, before turning into a secluded corner and spraying a layer of Axe Kiwi. Seductive, yet not overly so. Besides, if she was going to get her results first, she was going to have to be smooth with the DNA technician.

"Hey, Wendy," Sara greeted, swaying her way over to Wendy's desk, leaning against it as she looked down at the obviously stressed brunette. Wendy inhaled to begin a sigh, but stopped abruptly as the scent of Sara and Kiwi invaded her senses. She looked up at the taller brunette with a smile, semi-hypnotized by Sara's alluring swagger.

"Hi, Sara," she finally answered, leaning back in her chair, trying to avoid being completely overtaken by the scent. Sara held up a bag of evidence, giving the technician a sympathetic smile.

"I'm so sorry about them being assholes and trying to push you around, I'm glad you stood up to them. And I'm also sorry for having to pile up more evidence on your desk... It's a shame to have such a beauty cooped up in a tiny lab like this..." Sara said in a soft voice, using all her luck to try and get this to work. Wendy grinned and shrugged.

"Yeah, well, it's my job after all... Thanks for stopping by, Sara," Wendy answered as she took the evidence bag from Sara's hand. Sara put her hand on the younger brunette's wrist, smiling as she did so.

"Anytime, anytime." The leggy woman then turned and strode out of the DNA lab. She turned slightly and watched as Wendy moved all the other evidence bags over and started working on her evidence right way. Sara grinned.

Mission accomplished.

**DAY 5...**

Sara stumbled towards her locker, her head connecting against the steel with a loud thud. _What a long day... _She thought to herself as she opened the locker, hell bent on having a shower and going home. The lanky brunette grabbed a towel, a brush and her Axe Snake Peel shower gel and clunked her way off to the showers.

Stripping down quickly, she stepped under the hot spray, working quickly to lather up and get rid of the blasted grim of the day. She leaned against the wet tiles, her mind working over the day. She had come in, attempted to not fight with Catherine, ended up fighting with her anyway, spent the rest of the day in the desert and the car, got covered in sweat and sand and finally stumbled back here.

In the distance of the locker room, Sara thought she heard some clinking, but she didn't particularly care. The brunette applied another layer of Snake Peel, closing her eyes and turning in the spray.

"You know, I really like that scent." Sara's eyes popped open, immediately met with the sight of a smirking, naked Catherine. The brunette's jaw hit the floor, and she backed up against the tiles, temporarily unable to speak. Catherine followed her, pinning her to the tiles.

"But I think I like the sight of you naked better..." The strawberry blonde mumbled, leaning in to kiss Sara's lips passionately. The brunette's mind went into overdrive, but the only coherent thought she could really make was simple enough in content.

_Damn, I love Axe._

Goofy, but great, eh?


End file.
